There is no question that your sex life
has its ups and downs whether you are married or single. But married people, for some reason, take sex for granted and often say that they do not have time for sex. The fact is that you must make time for sex
. And there are ways to do so, even if you are the busiest person on the planet. Let's face it, unless you are the president of the United States, you are not the busiest person on the planet. Regardless, here are methods (that have worked for others) to make time for sex:
Commit to Having Sex
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The first step to finding time for sex is to decide that you are simply going to have sex
. Talk to your spouse and make a commitment to one another to have sex a certain number of times per week or month, whatever will satisfy both of you. Then, keep that promise. Until and unless you make the decision to definitely have sex, you will come up with excuses or get sidetracked by other things. Now, this does not mean that sex should become a chore on your to-do list. It just means that you have decided sex is a priority.
Let Sex Happen
We have all had those moments where our spouse sneaks up on us from behind or plants a big movie-like kiss on us unexpectedly. Things might start to get hot and heavy, but one of you says, "Not now, I have to wash the dishes, mow the lawn, do some work, etc., etc." The next time your spouse starts pawing you, go with the flow. Let sex happen, even if you think you are too tired. Trust me, a few of the right strokes and your spouse will more than wake you up
, and you might even rest more peacefully after making love.
Schedule SexThis might not sound very romantic. But we schedule everything else in our lives, so why not sex? By penciling in time for sex, you are making sure that it will happen. After all, if you plan on having sex from 9 to 10 p.m. on Tuesday, you will not make any other appointments or schedule any other activities during that time. You will certainly have time for it. You will literally be working sex into your schedule. Having sex is more romantic than not having it, so feel free to schedule to your heart's content. Of course, make sure your spouse is scheduling sex for the same time, too.
Build Anticipation for Sex
If you are anticipating or desiring sex, you are more likely to make time for it. Lots of foreplay - sexy text messages
, playful kissing
and touching in the morning before work, or wearing your sexiest lingerie
under your work clothes - can all help boost desire. You will not be able to think of anything else but sex. When you get home, you will be more than happy to put off doing the laundry or taking out the garbage for a little time in bed with your spouse. In fact, if you keep building anticipation for sex, you might not even have to schedule it anymore.
Follow Up with More SexTalk to your spouse after a few weeks of putting in this additional effort to have sex. Discuss whether you are both satisfied with the improvements. You might find that have more sex is making you want more sex. Maybe you will work even more sex into your busy schedule. Maybe you will be fine with your new sex life just the way it is. Regardless, it is important to check in with one another about matters, such as sex, which can cause rifts and arguments in a marriage. Sex should be one of the things that unites the two of you and not one of the things that divides you. Keep it that way by making sex apart of your marriage routine. You will find that your marriage is more fun with sex than without it.