1. People & Relationships
You can opt-out at any time. Please refer to our privacy policy for contact information.

Before You Have a Baby


Couple walking with Eiffel Tower in the background
Blend Images - Dave & Les Jacobs/Brand X Pictures/Getty Images

Newlyweds often discuss whether and when to have a baby. Before you consider having a baby, if you have the time, you should make sure your husband and you have fulfilled a certain level of growth in your marriage and accomplished certain goals. Here is a list of things you might want to do before having a baby or even while you're pregnant -

Take a romantic vacation.

Before the two of you become three, take another honeymoon to a romantic locale or even in your own bedroom. The point is to spend some uninterrupted time together (which means turn off your phones, shut your laptops, and relax). If you are going to travel while pregnant, you’ll want to do so in the second trimester, when it’s safest. If you have an at-risk pregnancy and cannot travel at all, consider locking yourselves in your rooms, watching DVDs, cuddling, and snacking on popcorn and other treats. The point is to spend quality time just the two of you while you still can.


    Have lots o’ sex.

    Intimacy and sex are what keep a marriage exciting. Those who are having a healthy pregnancy are free to have sex as often as they’d like. If you can do it – and nausea or exhaustion isn’t getting the best of you – then you should go for it. Once baby arrives, having sex won’t be as easy as before. And these precious moments of intimacy before baby should be savored and enjoyed.


      Romance each other.

      Whether you can have sex or not, you can always flirt and make romantic gestures to let your spouse know that you’re excited about expanding your family and that this beautiful time in your life is punctuated by the love you share for one another. Write love letters, read love poems, bring each other flowers, have candlelit dinners, whatever brings a smile and loving feelings to you both.


        Prepare for parenting.

        Nothing can really prepare you for becoming parents. But you can discuss your approaches to parenting, what you’re looking forward to, what you’re concerned about, and how you’ll discipline your kids. Talking about parenting and the changes that are coming can help relieve your stress and make the future seem less mysterious.


          Save money.

          Baby will require some serious cash for bottles, formula, breast pumps, furniture, clothing, etc. As the years go on, he or she will pump you for more money for things such as tennis lessons, more food, and education. Get rid of your debt, make a budget, and start saving money now.


            Talk about big issues.

            Now is the time to discuss important issues that most couples should face but often avoid. Get these talks – about everything from how to deal with finances and your wills to setting rules for the in-laws – out of the way before your child arrives and ends up feeling stuck in the middle or in an extra-tense situation. Stay calm and communicate well, and you should get through these conversations with no problem at all.


              1. About.com
              2. People & Relationships
              3. Newlyweds
              4. Having a Baby
              5. Before You Have a Baby

              ©2014 About.com. All rights reserved.