Bridal magazines are not just for brides. They are also for married folk. You can get great ideas for parties (just adapt some of the big wedding ideas for your intimate get togethers). Also, sometimes, you'll find great advice on how to keep your marriage intact. Recently, Sherry Amatenstein, interviewed couples about the secret of their happy marriage. The results are in the April 2014 issue of Brides, but you can get a sneak peek online. My favorite line in the preview of the piece is: "Marriage isn't a fairy tale. Think of life together as a novel with some slow chapters." Newlyweds especially seem to think that every day is going to be as exciting as the wedding, but that's not reality, so learning to manage your expectations early on is great advice.
I have always had a knack for remembering the wedding songs my relatives have chosen through the years. "Masterpiece," "You're my Everything," Lady in Red (sung as Lady in White)", "I Only Have Eyes for You," and almost anything by Celine Dion are on the list. Today, I was feeling particularly nostalgic for the early days of marriage, back when everything was simpler and more fun. So, I was humming our wedding song, "Stai Con Me," an Italian tune about a guy asking a girl to stay with him in the good and bad. Nothing like a good love song to put into words what's in your heart. I bet I was successful in getting you to hum your own wedding song. Try getting that out of your head now.
About a year ago, my husband and I continuously argued about how much time we should spend in his native Italy with our then 18-month-old son. I wanted to stay in the States more because he was having difficulty speaking and we plan to send him to school in the States, where everyone speaks English. My husband wanted him to spend time with his family in Italy before he started school and would be unable to to stay so long. In the end, I was exhausted from arguing, and I thought the tension was worse for my son than going to Italy, so my husband won.
For a long time, it caused a rift in our marriage. Even while we were in Italy, I resented him. And he thought I was just being difficult because I wanted to be with my people in my country. Really, it's a lot more complicated than all this. This is our fight that never ends. But we're in a much better place now.
Part of the reason we've gotten past this difficult patch is because I gave in and stayed nine months in his country and now we're in the States and our son is going to speech therapy, so it's all working out. Part of the reason is we fundamentally love each other and want to make our family work. The final part is because we're constantly learning how to fight better. Realizing how much this helped our marriage, I decided to share how I learned to take a breather in an argument and I updated "10 Tips for Fighting Fairly" to include more links to helpful tips. I wish for you awesome arguments and lots more making up.
If you're wondering how your relationship with your spouse will be forever changed by the prospect of parenthood, then you don't want to miss "How Having a Baby Will Affect Your Marriage." In this article, I share some of the basic ways the two of you will be forever changed by growing your family. I recently updated the piece to include more information and lots of links to other useful articles for parents to be (or potential parents to be). While parenting is not for the faint of heart, there are some positives, too. Trust me, when that baby wraps his or her little finger around yours, you will feel a love wash over you that you have never known.
I'm a plan ahead kind of girl. So, I'm gearing up for Mardi Gras and St. Patty's Day right about now. Being in the spirit motivated me to write up a quick guide on how to make your St. Patrick's Day celebration part revelry and all romantic. A feast for two is a great way to go on March 17 when you're newlyweds. What are your plans for the holiday?
Those early days of marriage bring with them some peculiarity. I'm not talking about the awkward moment when your mom starts busting you about when you're going to give her grandkids, although there is that. I'm talking about the ways in which you and your spouse interact. You're not strange. You're just clearly and obviously newlyweds. Upon noticing some of these signs of newlywedom, I decided to document them here. You'll probably find that at least some of these signs apply to you and your spouse, too.
Houses and apartments become homes because of our attention. Nowadays, we're all so busy that it's hard to find the time to tend to the home. I'm not saying that you should channel Martha Stewart, give up your job, and take up ironing as a hobby. But we could all stand to provide our home with some TLC. Maybe we need to paint an entryway or deep clean some carpets. It's not all about cleaning or renovating either. Sometimes, small changes can make a big difference.
There are some things that every home should have. Having these things will make it feel as though your house is embracing you whenever you walk in. You can discover "7 Essentials for the Home" right on this site. Once you roll up your sleeves and give some of this attention to your home, you can kick back and relax and reap the rewards of your labor. You won't be disappointed - or maybe I'm the only one who feels zen after vacuuming and scrubbing a few toilets.
There's an old joke about marriage. It goes like this, according to Sarasota Weddings Web site:
A newlywed, Tom, and his father meet for lunch. "Well son," asked the dad, "how is married life treating you?"
"Not very well, I'm afraid. It seems that I married a nun."
"A nun??" his father exclaimed.
"That's right. None in the morning, none at night and none unless I beg."
The father nodded knowingly, and patted his son on the back. "Why don't we all get together for a nice talk tonight?"
Toms face brightened. "Say Dad, that's a great idea."
"Fine. I'll call and tell Mother Superior to set two extra plates."
If you've been married recently, you might find this joke funny, but you probably don't think it's true. Frankly, marriage seems to be a breeding ground for sex, especially during that all-too-brief and all-too-passionate honeymoon phase. Discover this secret about married sex and many others in the new article, "5 Secrets about Married Sex."
Recently, I shared my own struggle to decide whether we should have another baby. Financial concerns and the fact that I already feel stretched thin with the one child topped my reasons for not having a second baby. And my vision of a family of four with a sibling for my son topped my reasons to go for it. Still, I'm undecided. I'm pretty sure my husband is as confused as I am.
So, I started to scout out advice from expert resources online and do some deep reflecting. Since I'm sure I'm not the only one dealing with this issue, I outlined my findings in "Should You Have Another Baby?" Here, you'll find all the questions to ask yourselves as you attempt to make this big decision.
I'm all about a fresh start nowadays. I'm sick of the winter, I've just returned home to the States after nearly a year of living in Italy, and I also parted ways with a decade-long employer and and found a new one. In fact, I haven't felt this way about life since I kicked off my marriage five years ago. Back then, I also wanted to make sure my clean slate was as spic and span as possible.
With this in mind, I've turned my attention to cleaning and organizing. That led me to spend some time scouring About.com for housekeeping tips, which I'm happy to share with you in "How to Clean House." Give it a read and you too can get a jump start on spring cleaning. I'm looking at it this way, it's another cure for cabin fever, which is setting in for those of us getting pounded by snow this winter. I'd rather scrub the floors instead of banging my head against the walls that are starting to close in on us.